English Fairy Tales: The Ass, The Table and the Stick
Between and , they became more common: the University of Southern California General Hospital admitted one patient per month who had stuck and lost something up their butt for the first time. Since then, emergency rooms have officially stopped classifying foreign rectal bodies as an uncommon reason for admittance, according to a study by doctors at Massachusetts General Hospital. The question is packed with judgment, though the existing medical research on the practice suggests that the haters should take the sticks out of their asses. Or rather, to leave them there and open their minds as well. While much of the snickering about things in butts has to do with their sexual implications, the medical records show that most rectal foreign bodies are actually various household items , dentures, or chicken bones that were swallowed and got stuck along the way. Because of that, the data on colorectal search and rescue missions skew toward the very old and the very young.
I bring to you the definitive guide to what not to stick up your butt! The glorious paper back guide with a colored pages, illustrated and written by me, Francisco Salinas. My years of experience and dedication to my craft shall help guide those in need! The road is long and narrow, but with your help I know we can conquer anything!
There was once a tailor who had three sons and one goat. And the goat, as she nourished them all with her milk, was obliged to have good food, and so she was led every day down to the willows by the water-side; and this business the sons did in turn. One day the eldest took the goat to the churchyard, where the best sprouts are, that she might eat her fill and gambol about. There was nothing to pull, Though I looked all about me — ba!